The Rotary Club of Corringham Thameside

Richard Wilson and Rick Wakeman eat your heart out. When it comes to Grumpy Old Men, Corringham Thameside are a match for anyone.
On Thursday 25th June, the club held a “Grumpy Old Men” evening which gave the members the opportunity to “sound off” about their beef’s. Who would be declared the grumpiest? The early betting made Brian Price and Peter Burfoot “odds on” favourites, but when it was ruled that Brian could not talk about food or onions (on the grounds that that would come into “the fussy old git” category) the odds lengthened.
Each member had just two minutes to moan about their particular beefs. Subjects as diverse as inconsistant cloud formations, pensions and taxes, centralisation, driving standards, T.V. interviews and the celebrity culture ran off their tongues with ease. Brian Price, having had his wings clipped by the earlier ruling, gave a diatribe about not being able to renew his T.V. licence at the post office. He wasn’t going to do it on line, and then he found out he would have to pay cash. One has to ask, when did he last renew his licence? I bet it was in the days of black and white! Peter Burfoot also fell short with a similar moan about getting his fishing licence, and Peter Mestanek went on about the proposed interception of E-mails that might make him out to be some form of terrorist. We never found out why, because he was deemed out of time.
Doug Nash sounded off about drivers who don’t signal correctly before making a manouvre. what does he expect, no doubt the drivers he was complaining about were busy on their mobile phone and you can’t expect them to do everything. John Wallington bemoaned the tolls at the Dartford crossing whilst the President went on about drivers hogging the fast lanes on the motorways.
Clive yallop expounded on the cost of a Mars bar (£4.50) whilst on holiday and £9 for tea for two. This was also disallowed as he had been going on about it ever since his return from Majorca. John Cooper brought upm the age old problem of supermarket shopping with the wife, whilst Graham Palmer went on about the difficulties of obtaining leather to repair his shoes. (Doesn’t he realise most of us take our shoes to the repairers.)
Pride of place however, went to dear old Sherwin Chase (the definite outsider as far as the betting went) who recalled the occasion immediately after the outbreak of war (the Boer war we think) when he was still living with his grandmother, who told him he should do something. Sherwin’s reaction was to travel to London and demand he be made First Lord of the Admiralty. Unfortunately, they told him that Winston Churchill had lready got the job. Poor old Sherwin, he was so disappointed, he’s held a grudge ever since.
Whereas all the other members gripes were met with howls of derision, Sherwin was applauded by all those present. He was presented with the coveted certificate which proclaimed him as Corringham Thameside’s Grumpiest Old Man. When Winston Churchill returned as First Lord of the Admiralty the powers that be signalled the fllet with the famous signal “Winnie’s Back” we’d like to tell the world SHERWIN WON!

Trackback URI | Comments RSS